Panic Attacks and Anxiety - Thank you BC Pill :(

Hi everyone!
I know I don't normally post something in a letter format here but I have gotten so many panic attack and anxiety attack emails lately that I was thinking about doing an online seminar about the subject. It is really hard for me to reply to everyone in a timely manner and at length to give you all that you want and need... So I was thinking with a Live Online session where you can hear me talk and ask questions at the same time - we might be able to make some impact in everyone's recovery!

Plus, it would be available after too for people to look at.

What do you ladies think? Is it something that would be of interest to you? If so leave a comment and I'll come up with a time and date in the near future. The event would be live on facebook.

Hugs and healing to you all.
~Helena

Panic Attacks thanks to the Pill?!

Yes, it is more fact that speculation at this point. There is no doubt in my entire body, mind, and soul that panic attacks are caused by the pill or the detox from them. The many synthetic hormones mixed with chemicals we gladly swallow down every day do cause damage...

...and one of those can be, yup you guessed it; Panic Attacks 

For those of you who have no idea what a panic attack feels like, let me try to explain it... 

All of a sudden, from seemingly nowhere, you start to feel nervous like something is wrong. Your internal senses are on high alert. Danger Danger Danger! However, your logical brain understands that nothing is wrong because you were just watching a romantic comedy on TV, or standing in line at the grocery store, or sitting at your desk at work, or taking a walk with the dog... Nothing about the situation you are in is dangerous, nor has it ever been in the past. 

It feels like your surroundings are closing in on you and there is no escape. Your heart starts to beat harder and faster, and your chest might even hurt. You feel like there is not enough oxygen, nor can you take a normal deep breath. You are so afraid... maybe you are dying. Yes, that is what you start to think after a few minutes. This is what dying feels like you tell yourself... It is time to die...  

Then, the attack ends. Out of nowhere it seems like. 

If this was your first attack, you hope that it was the only one... However, the more you get the more nervous you are going to be about getting them again. If you frequently get them at the grocery store - there is a pretty good chance you will become afraid of going to the grocery store because your reality of getting panic attacks there are bigger than the reality of how logically safe a grocery store really is. 

Panic attacks create fear and more panic attacks and you truly feel stuck in a place where you don't understand who you are anymore. You have no logical reason to these panic attacks. Yet, you seem to be completely unable to manage them or preventing them to come again.    

So, no matter if you are having panic attacks from side effects of the BC pill or any other medication, or if they are happening to you anyway.. I have decided to do a short live broadcast on how you can take care of yourself in those situations. The broadcast will happen either the end of May or June. To be notified on exactly when and stay updated like my page SunnySoul Coach on facebook, it is free ;) 

Love and support always. 

Why is the Pill being advertised "for the Woman" - isn't it really for the man?!

Hi everyone.
I know it has been silent here for a while... but that doesn't mean any of the other posts aren't still true. Side effects of taking and quitting any BC pills is still a serious matter and women are suffering every day and night.

I was just asked a few questions by a dear woman who is working on a report and I thought I would share some of it here as I feel it is relevant. Her questions were so innovative, I hadn't thought about it in that angle before... Here goes:

How do you think then pill has gone from being a liberating turning point in women’s history to this damaging life style drug? 

This is a fantastic question and a very good observation! I think my initial reaction is: IGNORANCE. I am pretty sure side effects existed back then too but since it was labelled as the new and fantastic thing – you were not a liberated woman if you didn't take it… and what woman don’t want to be liberated?! Feel like SHE is in CHARGE of her own body. 

When the pill was studied, they could have put the effort into making a male pill but they didn't. They choose to alter the woman’s reproductive functions to save the man’s. Neither would have been right off course, but did it happen because back then the industry was flooded with men? I would like to guess so… No man want to ever temper with his reproductive organs and functions – that is pride right there! 

And can you imagine a man taking the pill when the side effects are: Loss of libido, loss of hair, depression, loss of stamina, muscle deterioration, frequently UTI… LOL… I think not. There was no way the industry back then were going to put themselves and their fellow men in that situation. I have no proof of this, but a girl can guess can’t she?!

With today’s influence of so many streams we can finally speak up and someone will listen. If I look at just my story; for years I believed I was “alone” with my side effects until I found someone else’s story online and I thought she was writing about me… That didn't exist back then, so I can only imagine how many women were suffering back then too but didn't have any support system or even understanding that this could be related. It is still being fought today – most medical professionals I have been in contact with regarding this still do not believe the side effects are so life altering. At least that is not what they communicate.

In essence I think it has always been a damaging life style drug, it just wasn't spoken about as much back then as it is now.. People and women are more aware, even if we have a looooonge way to go still.

Also, the fact there still remains to be a female contraceptive pill that doesn't effect women’s health, do you think women’s health is undervalued? 

In my opinion our complaints haven’t been taken seriously. Especially when we walk in to a doctor’s office looking like we are at the top of the world. 25, skinny, active, attractive, etc etc… The problem isn't the pill in itself but how it is being used and marketed. Just think about it – when do you normally take a pill? When you are sick right!? For women to want to take a pill, they first have to be convinced they are sick… 

And now we are almost living in a society where a monthly menstrual cycle is frowned upon – There is a pill for that! So looking back, all of a sudden fertility was a woman’s fault. It was her responsibility to be infertile to suit the need of her man and their sexual relationship. Being fertile was all of a sudden like being sick! – well guess what, there is pill for that! 

A BIG reason

There is a reason this blog exist...
It is NOT a good reason.

The reason is because so many women's lives have been ruined, altered and/or effected negatively because of hormonal birth control. The list of side effects are never ending and I myself took a life time decision in 2009 that I would never again take synthetic hormonal birth control ever again. And that decision also lead me to question much of what is being offered in the disguise of "medicine" today. Medicine is not healing, medicine today is concealing....

Support the effort to bring the documentary "Sweetening the Pill" to life!!  

I hate myself for going on Yasmin

I have had a terrible experience with Yasmin. I started it in September this year (2014). Before this I was on Levelyn ED since 2008.

I decided to switch to Yasmin because of the so called benefits such as clearer skin, lighter periods etc. When I asked my doctor if he could prescribe this pill he did not hesitate at all. He didn't ask me any questions about my health or whether I had a history of anxiety or bloods clots or anything. This made me believe that this pill wouldn't be so bad. I assumed that if it had bad side effects he would have told me. I soon learned how wrong I was. 

As soon as I began taking Yasmin I was very thirsty, dehydrated all the time. I thought perhaps I was not drinking enough water. Note that I only ever drink water and ONE cup of coffee a day - I do not drink much alcohol, except maybe one glass of wine a month, nor any soft drinks. No matter how much water I drank I could not rehydrate myself.

I had a feeling that the dehydration was the result of the Yasmin but I ignored it as I did not think it was anything major. After a couple of weeks I no longer felt dehydrated. Instead, I begun feeling anxious and with this I had diarrhea. In the past, I have had very mild anxiety with diarrhea (I now believe this is from my other birth control pill) but it was never this bad. I was not sure if it was the diarrhea causing the anxiety or the other way around. At first it happened every couple of days and on weekends when I was catching up with friends. I thought this was just me being silly so I took gastro-stop (anti-diarrhea medication) and ignored it. After about a month, I was waking up with diarrhea every morning which continued into the day and would re-occur at night. I was having full on panic attacks for absolutely no reason at all. I thought I was going crazy. I could not eat with fear of going to the bathroom and lost weight.

Eventually it all got so bad and I started doing research on Yasmin. I worked out that it was the Yasmin that was making me like this. I decided it was time to stop. That was when everything went down hill.

Monday, October 20th, this year was my first day without Yasmin. I was still feeling somewhat anxious but I was happy that I stopped taking Yasmin and was looking forward to getting back to normal again. On Tuesday I felt worse, having a panic attack at work. When I got home from work I had terrible anxiety and diarrhea. On Wednesday, I felt even worse and left work early to go home. I thought that perhaps I had gastro or a stomach bug (it was this bad).

On that Wednesday everything changed.

Once I got home I had a horrible panic attack and it lasted for hours. I had chronic diarrhea and could not even have a sip of water without going to the bathroom. I was also nauseous. My entire body was trembling and my heart was palpitating and felt as though it was going to jump out of my chest. I had never felt like this before, EVER! I was rushed to the emergency room and put on a drip immediately. I had every sort of test performed on me imaginable. All of my tests came out perfect. The doctor told me I was perfectly fine and that I probably had a bug, to drink lots of water and I would be fine. I told him that I had stopped taking Yasmin and done research on this - I asked if this was the withdrawal symptoms of stopping Yasmin. He said no.

The next day I felt slightly better but as it got later in the day I was exactly the same again. And, once again I was rushed to the emergency room. I had more tests done and they told me I was fine and probably had a bug. I told the doctor about the Yasmin and he ignored me. I was sent home after the tests came back fine and I had a drip as well as morphine to calm me down.

I have not been in the hospital since then but my symptoms have not really gone away. I admit that I am better than I was but to this day (it has been almost one month) I have had diarrhea and some anxiety daily. I have seen a doctor about this TWICE. on the first occasion he told me this was not the result of Yasmin. He said the symptoms I was having were too severe to be related to Yasmin. On the second occasion, he told me that MAYBE this was the result of Yasmin but this was "rare". He said I would be fine after another week. He was wrong.

I have no idea what to do. I spend hours everyday crying and have had thoughts of ending my life. I cannot enjoy the things I used to enjoy and I hate myself for going on Yasmin. I refuse to take any other pills or to put any other chemicals in my body. I feel like I will never get better. I feel like there is something wrong with me even though I know Yasmin is the root of my problems. I know it has only been just under a month but how long will this last? I have been taking various vitamins and minerals but nothing seems to help.

I hate that doctors won't admit that we are suffering from Yasmin side effects. It's not fair.

I have days where I am positive and feel like I will be fine. Then on other days I feel like I am just getting worse all over again. I don't know how to help myself and its not fair that I am putting my family, friends and boyfriend through this. I have had thoughts of breaking up with my boyfriend so he doesn't have to see me like this.

Any advice will really help and I would really appreciate to hear some success stories from women who have experienced similar symptoms and recovered.

Thank you.
Camilla,
Adelaide, South Australia

Birth Control Side effects (just a small list, nothing to worry about)

Birth control is a subject that has become a mission bigger than myself... I feel a need to spread the word to everyone I speak with and I wish someone could have shared with me ten years ago what I know today... But on the other hand if someone would have done that - I would not have been here today, trying to work so hard for it.

Birth control in the form of IUD, Pill, Implant, Shot, Ring or Patch are a hormonal form of birth control. They are accepted as the NORM by many; including our parents, friends and doctors and are not questioned enough. What we learn about them are the so called benefits and not side effects - and in many cases the side effect is looked upon as that 1-something percent chance of getting pregnant... (Off course getting pregnant will change your life forever and I am not trying to hide that...) but there is so much more than that. So much that not many speak about, or even acknowledge as being related.

More often than NOT are our symptoms ignored, laughed at, or treated with medications that most often fail. Why, I do not know - but I am sad that it has to be that way... there are so many young wonderful women out there that need the support that are left alone to think that it is all in their heads.

I am here to tell you that it is NOT in your head - your symptoms are very much real and are related to hormonal birth control, (or hormonal treatment during menopause if you are at that stage in your life):

• Hair loss
• Heart Palpitations
  
• Vision blurres
• Astigmatism
• High Blood pressure
• Allergy reactions
• Sinus problems
• Vaginal Dryness
• Depression
• Anxiety
• Panic attacks
• Insomia
• Symptom of Hypothyroidism
• Low tolerance to carbohydrates
• Poor nutrition absorbtion
• Diarrhea 
• Dizzyness
• Alcohol and/or Caffeine sensitiveness
• Feeling faint
• Weight Gain
• Weight Loss
  
• Low or no sex drive
• Spotting in-between periods
• Irregular Bleeding
• Cold sores
• Low immune system
• UTI
• Memory problems
• Bloating
• Mood swings
• Migraines
• Head aches
• Weepiness
• PCOS
• Sensitive to the sun
• Nervousness 
• Chronically tired
• Changes in skin 
• Muscle cramps or pain
• Heart attack
• Stroke
• Blood clot

As you can see most symptoms have nothing to do with your reproductive tract (vagina, uterus, menstruation)... and they may be overlooked by yourself even, as a symptom of your birth control method. And if you suspect that it is linked you must prepare yourself that your suspicion might be dismissed by the doctor or gynecologist. You must listen to your body! Taking beta blockers, anti depressants, and/or use Rogain shampoo will NOT treat your real underlying issue, only hide it - if you are lucky - and then you should also hope for no side effects of this options. The only way you are truly going to get rid of this is to get off the hormonal birth control, and by that I mean GET OFF, not try another one, and restore your body's natural hormone balance; which could be a trip to hell and back but worth the ride in the end!

Your health comes first! It is really that simple. Without your health in tact you cannot care for your loved ones in the best possible way. Take care of YOU first! If you are taking hormonal birth control you should really sit down and ask yourself if it is worth the risks when there are so many other available options out there that does not include hormones when it comes to birth control...

Two Surgeries thanks to Yasmin and the comforting words from my Doc

I went on Yasmin in 2005 and thought I loved it at first...
Then, I started getting headaches all the time, strange paresthesia sensations in my hands. My heart would skip beats, and I eventually started getting stabbing pains every once in a while in my chest. Couldn't handle hot weather in the summer, and actually had heat exhaustion twice.

I Never thought it was my pill.

Then I started to see the commercials about Ocella being bad for you. So I called my doctors office to see if I needed to change pills. They were not concerned and told me the risks are the same for all pills. So I was like okay, I guess I will stay on it...

Well, I just didn't feel right about a year later and just stopped taking my pills. See; what the doctor doesn't tell you is that this pill has a diuretic in it. One that alters your potassium levels. Well, potassium is kind of important for muscle function, nerves , CLOTTING factors, oh yeah and THE POLARIZATION OF THE HEART. So that is probably why my heart was skipping beats and I was having anxiety. So after being on a diuretic without my knowledge for five years, what happens when I abruptly stop?

- My blood pressure went through the roof, and I started having intermittent claudication when I walked. So I went to the Doc to make sure I didn't have a clot, and my blood pressure was 140/104. I usually run 118/68! Hello rebound hypertension! Thanks Yasmin!

All of my problems were caused by electrolyte imbalance due to diuresis. I was pretty much dehydrated for FIVE years. After coming off, my body wanted to keep every bit of fluid that it could. I have also had two surgeries on my reproductive organs in two years. Since Yasmin took my progesterone and threw it out the window, I ended up with uterine polyps that had to be removed. They are caused by an over abundance of estrogen. So girls, avoid soy and its isoflavones!

The reason this pill has a higher clot risk is not rocket science. It's a little something called Virchow's Triad. Dehydration(the diuretic) + clotting disorder(potassium alteration)+ blood vessel injury = DVT. The FDA should know better! Are they trying to kill people? Yasmin gave us ladies 2 out of 3 of the risk factors for clots. Where most pills probably only give you one of the factors. That is a huge difference.

Fast forward two years. Things are better, but still not back to where I was before. It is a long and painful process, and I still get acne from time to time, which I never had before this pill. I am no longer on ACE inhibitors for blood pressure and my body finally started to regulate itself again. I don't eat anything processed, and I had to learn to be patient. I just wish I had known what was really in this pill before my Doc gave it to me. Had I known about the diuretic I would have said no way! Good luck to all the ladies out there just now quitting this pill. You are not alone! I only was able to put all the pieces together once I started school for nursing.

I am now an angry girl that hopes she can still have kids one day. We'll see...

~Anonymous

On Yasmin 4 years 

My sister asked me what birth control pill I was on

My name is Maria and I am from Romania. Thank you so much for having the initiative to create this blog. I have discovered it as Yasmin almost ruined my life.

I have been taking Yasmin for 8 month now and about 4 months ago everything changed. I was a lively person, who laughed and enjoyed everything in her life, who couldn't wait for the weekend to come to see her boyfriend. Soon after starting taking Yasmin, everything changed. The panic attacks began, I cried for no reason I felt I was going crazy and nobody understood me. I really felt I was going nuts until this morning when my sister came to me and asked me which BCP I was taking. I answered that I was on yasmin and she said that my moods and my panic attacks and everything has an explanation. She then told me about a former colleague of hers who, in college, after taking Yasmin for several months threw a knife at her. Then I understood I was not crazy and that Yasmin are responsible for everything.

I don t want to lose my relationship, my parents, and friends because of some stupid pill that can ruin your life.

Thank you so much and once again congrats for this blog.

Kind regards,

Maria.

Since taking Yaz I have now developed a vascular condition

Hi ladies,

I have been reading your post on the Yasmin and Yaz Survivor Forum and here on the Blog for some time and have joined to thank you all for your thoughts and contributions. 

The support and sentiments expressed here are so valuable when there is such little information forthcoming from doctors or the drug manufacturer.

Many women are having difficulty transitioning from Yaz and Yasmin birth control, and I have long suspected that the 'mild' anti aldosterone properties of drospirenone have an effect on the renin angiotensin aldosterone system for a number of months thereafter.

I have experienced constant tachycardia, blood pressure problems, back pain in kidney area, fluid retention, unbearable surges in adrenalin, muscle weakness, sensitivity with regards to my central nervous system, visible strong tremors in hands, lack of coordination, brain fog, hair loss, decreased urination and alternatively excessive urination, odd, random bouts of nausea that disappear as quickly as they appear, vision disturbances, tingling and twitching in extremities...bizarre.

My doctor has used words like 'you are stressed and anxious' to smother my concerns. I think we all know there's a bit of a stigma associated with researching health ailments online, but what's a girl to do when your practitioners are constantly being evasive? Making you feel like a giddy hypochondriac but at the same time putting you on a beta blocker? I smell a rat. How about you?

Since taking Yaz I have now developed a vascular condition (diagnosed by a doctor) that is likely to worsen over the course of my life. All this before the age of 30! Anxiety indeed.
I have no history of serious health problems, no history of heart or other diseases in my family or myself that may be contraindicated with birth control use, non-smoker, always had low blood pressure (even in my pregnancy), a long background of birth control use without complication, and extended breaks without birth control...no complication.

I think my health status is pertinent to note. Around the time I ceased taking Yaz my decline was very rapid and at one stage I was down to 44kg (99lbs)...an old work colleague of mine came to visit me at my worst and cried when she saw me. My quality of life was severely limited for approximately four months thereafter.

On a positive note we are now at seven months past and last week was my first week where I felt almost completely normal! Though the cynic in me feels that you can't be that sick without some long term battles...there were a few times there that I thought I might die.

Sending lots of love and light to you all.
~Anonymous 

Yasmin ON Libido GONE

I recently received an email from Iulia that I wanted to share with you all (with her permission off course). The email is slightly edited for clarity. Iulia's story describes so perfectly how a woman's mind can be totally transformed by being on the pill (or any other hormonal contraceptive). The thoughts and feelings that crawl on us without any truth to it is mesmerizing - and to think that a FDA approved birth control pill is the cause is beyond scary.

Hello!
My name is Iulia and I want to start out by pointing out that I am a resident doctor in psychiatry, so you can understand that not even a doctor can figure out what he/she going through, and even less with what his/her patients are going through.

I started taking oral contraceptives in 2002 or 2003, can`t exactly remember the year (all I remember is that I was not a med student back then). I started oral contraceptives because my menstrual period was not at all regular (I got my first period when I was in 3rd or 4th grade!!!), mostly based on my low-grade obesity; once I lost about 20kg and got my weight in normal range, everything became ok: my periods were like clockwork!

My OBYG recommended taking Lo-Femenal. I took those for about 2 years and had absolutely no problems while on it - but suddenly my menstruation transformed itself from being a red-colored one, into a greyish color. Kind of spooky and I stopped them. 

In 2006 I had an abortion (was not on the pill at the time) due to a broken condom and decided to go on the pill again. I developed obsessive ideas about being pregnant. I did 2 pregnancy tests every week just to make sure even though I had no sexual contact at all. Looking back now, I know it was PTSD. After three months I was fully recovered from the mental agony of the abortion. 

Picture taken from here

In January 2007 I started Yasmin and since then, hell broke loose step by step. All of my symptoms on Yasmin started gradually, so I never thought that Yasmin might be the cause of them. First of all was my libido: I was always keen on sex and suddenly all of that just vanished. "Ok" I thought to myself, maybe it is something temporary, I'll just wait (I waited for 5 years and nothing); luckily I have a boyfriend (now fiancee and soon husband) that understands somewhat what I was and am going through.

Second to that, maybe one year after, the mood changes started. First, it was not that bad, I was a little bit more depressed, cried easily and one week before my menstruation I was very irritable. But I managed keeping all the symptoms under control. About one year after that (2008), the paraesthesias started: on my face, my arms, I had the pinky of my right hand numb for 2 weeks non-stop, when I walked my legs became numb very quickly, I had cramps in my lower legs. I blamed all that to the lack of exercise (I have always been lazy when it came to physical exercise). 

As time went on, my boyfriend became more depressed about me not wanting any sexual activity whatsoever, one time I even called him a pervert when he tried to get me aroused, so I tried to explain to him that he is not the cause of my lack of libido, it is just that I do not feel the need for sex. Not at all. I tried having intercourse again, but that only happened maybe once every two months L and only because I knew he needed it. He started telling me that he wants his old Iulia back, that made me feel really guilty, but still no sexual desire. I tried, again, to explain that something is happening to me, I didn’t know what, but that he should be patient until I get my things straightened out. I would like to point out that he loves me A LOT and he has been supportive through this nasty experience all the way. 

Next I started to become jealous on every girl that talked to him. Every time he went out I started thinking that maybe he is going out with another woman, and I was very suspicious. But it passed away rather quickly.

Picture taken from here

2010: my boyfriend proposed! But, I felt nothing. He planned a trip to Budapest (he knew how badly I wanted to go to Budapest) and proposed there, but I was like: "Ok." What girl thinks that??? One should be happy when that happens, but I was very indifferent to that. When that happened I knew something was not quite right.

January 2012: had my first panic attack (basically when you have a panic attack, there are 3 types of thoughts going through your mind: you`re going to lose control, you`re going to die or that you are going insane) and since then I developed an obsession about going crazy; being a young psychiatrist, I researched every possible mental illness I could have, but deep inside I felt that it was somewhat connected to the pill.

In February 2012: I started having obsessive ideas about having cancer; CRUEL ideas, but I managed to keep them under some sort of control. A few months later, in May 2012: I had a bad case of diarrhea, with dehydration and started having a permanent state of panic and panic attacks; I blamed it all on dehydration and rapid heartbeats. While in a panic attack, I thought that my mother-in-law was planning to poison me and that became the source of my anxiety. I knew my thoughts are not normal, so I excluded the possibility of developing a delusional disorder or psychosis, but when the anxiety kicked back in, all my thoughts came back and I was back where I started: having cancer, my mother-in-law wanting to kill me and going crazy and ending up in an asylum…

Drawing taken from here

August 2012: extreme irritability and depression started; my anxiety was on a level of 9 out of 10, but only 2 weeks before my period; after my period I was back to somewhat normal. That continued for three months and in October I felt like I had no good days anymore. I started taking natural tranquilizers which have helped me a little bit and finally decided to stop the pill!!! I took my last pill on October 26, had my period and never went back on it again. Shortly after I went to see my coordinator (he is an old psychiatry professor) and I told him about what I was going through and told me THAT HAPPENS ON THE PILL!!

He also said that most of my symptoms are related to a deficiency in Magnesium, Zinc and Vitamin B6 so I started taking magnesium and b6 complex and it all feels right again. I can`t say all of my days are good, sometimes my anxiety kicks back, but at a more bearable intensity. But I have only been off the pill for 3 weeks now but it has made a huge impact in how I feel already.

~ Iulia

Romania